AMICITIA ("Friendship")

by Sr. Pia Ignatius, O.Carm.

On December 3^rd, we celebrated the feast day of Saint Francis Xavier, the great Jesuit missionary and best friend of Saint Ignatius of Loyola.  These two great men met in college, in fact, they were roommates at the University of Paris.  Francis didn’t much care for Ignatius at first.  He thought of him as over pious and Francis was more interested in being a “wild” college kid, keep in mind he was only 19, and Ignatius was 24 and an accomplished military officer at the time.  With much patience, time and prayer Ignatius won over Francis and helped him with his conversion.  The two men grew to love each other through the love of Christ. 

As time went by and the Society of Jesus grew, Ignatius needed to send missionaries to the Far East.  Francis volunteered when the original Jesuit fell ill and the two men had to make a huge sacrifice.  Later Ignatius would tell his best friend, "Go, set the world on fire!" After Xavier left for "the missions" the two would never see each other again. “I believe that in this life we cannot see each other anymore except by letters,” Francis writes Ignatius in one of his first letters. “To see each other face to face with many embracing—that will be for the other life.”  

Many letters were exchanged between the two friends but unfortunately Francis became gravely ill and died before Ignatius could call him back to Rome. In one of his final letters to Ignatius, and his fellow Jesuit brothers, he wrote: "So that I may never forget you and ever have a special remembrance of you, I would have you know, dear brothers, for my own consolation, I have cut your names from the letters which you have written to me with your own hands so that I may constantly carry them with me together with the valid profession which I made....I give thanks first of all to God our Lord, and then to you, most dear brothers and fathers, for the fact that God has so made you that I derive such great consolation from bearing your names. And since we shall soon see each other in the next life with greater peace than we have in this, I say no more." 

 Around his neck and close to his heart, Francis wore the signatures of his dear friends. “Let us ask God for the grace of seeing each other joined together in the next life,” Francis had once written Ignatius. “Whoever will be the first to go to the other life and does not there find his brother, whom he loves in the Lord, must ask Christ our Lord to unite us all there in his glory.”

In 1622, Francis and Ignatius were both declared saints. Bound together for eternity in mutual love for the God who brought them together, Francis and Ignatius are a powerful witness to the inexhaustible and transforming possibilities of friendship in the Lord.  An amazing testament to God’s love for us that He provides us companions for our Earthly journey.  

Upon reflecting on this great Saint, I couldn’t help but think of a dear friend of mine.  Tragically she was killed in a helicopter crash last July.  We were very close for a time but God called us to different paths.  She became a flight paramedic in New Mexico and I entered religious life with the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm.  We both had a zeal for being servants to others and caring for those in need.  For a time our paths were in sync and we traveled together with great joy.  But as we grew to follow our hearts we had to say our goodbyes and blaze new trails.  Like Francis and Ignatius, we never dreamed that we would not see each other again.  Friends may come and go in our lives but they will always leave a mark on our hearts.  It is God’s way of showing us how much He loves us. 

           

LIFE IS PRECIOUS: AN ADVENT REFLECTION

by Sr. Pia Ignatius, O.Carm.

It was the year after I graduated high school when I heard the news.  A fellow classmate took her own life.  She had just finished family dinner, when she excused herself from the table, took her father’s gun and used it to kill herself.  She was still alive when EMS arrived but was pronounced dead at the hospital.  She left behind a 3 year old daughter.

One sunny September morning, I was at work and my boss shouted down the hallway calling everyone into the conference room for a meeting.  This was not a good sign, an unannounced meeting.  We all sat down and noticed a grim look on his face.  He informed us that a fellow colleague and friend had taken his own life sometime in the early hours of the morning.  He lived alone, having been recently divorced with no children.  It was about a week before he was supposed to be his older brother’s best man.

As Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm, we take an oath to protect all life in every stage.  But how do you come to terms with someone who makes such a finite decision?  It is easy to say, “Oh that person was so selfish” or “That’s a permanent solution to a temporary problem” or “They must have been on drugs or drunk”.  No, that is not the case.  Suicide is often the unfortunate result of a battle with depression, just as a person who has a heart condition dies of a heart attack.  And for those who remain there is often the guilt of having survived.  Questions start to pop up.  Why didn’t I notice the warning signs?  Why didn’t this person reach out?  Why didn’t I reach out?  What could I have done differently?  Why God?  I don’t understand. 

The Catechism of the Catholic Church (2280) states: “Everyone is responsible for his life before God who has given it to him. It is God who remains the sovereign Master of life. We are obliged to accept life gratefully and preserve it for his honor and the salvation of our souls. We are stewards, not owners, of the life God has entrusted to us. It is not ours to dispose of.  (2281) Suicide contradicts the natural inclination of the human being to preserve and perpetuate his life. It is gravely contrary to the just love of self. It likewise offends love of neighbor because it unjustly breaks the ties of solidarity with family, nation, and other human societies to which we continue to have obligations. Suicide is contrary to love for the living God.  Grave psychological disturbances, anguish, or grave fear of hardship, suffering, or torture can diminish the responsibility of the one committing suicide.  (2283) We should not despair of the eternal salvation of persons who have taken their own lives. By ways known to him alone, God can provide the opportunity for salutary repentance. The Church prays for persons who have taken their own lives.”

How can we who are alive process this type of tragic event and help others to heal?  By listening.  St. Teresa of Avila and St. John of the Cross have said that it is through silence that God speaks to us.   People want to be loved and want to know that they are loved.  Love thy neighbor.  Love others as God loves you.  Be silent and listen. We are not God, we cannot be everywhere, we cannot see everything, or hear everything.  But we can be more aware.   We can make ourselves available.  We can take a moment out of our day and reach out to others.  A simple text message, a warm smile, grabbing a cup of coffee together, or inviting someone to Mass- these are just few examples of little things that can go a long way for someone who is at the end of their rope.  And above all PRAY. 

If you need someone, or know someone who needs someone, pick up the phone and call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255).  During this holiday season remember those who are alone or who feel lost and show Christ’s love to them. 

A SISTER'S PAGE: "The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns"- A Carmelite Review

by Sr. Jean Davis, O.Carm

The Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm can be so proud of their part in the Lifetime Channel show “The Sisterhood: Becoming Nuns.”  I am personally so very pleased that my religious community reached out courageously to participate, along with two other communities, in a reality show that could re-define future reality productions. 

Courage was a key element when our Foundress, Venerable Mary Angeline Teresa, stepped forward to found a new religious community devoted to the care of the aged and infirm.  In 1929, the Congregation was the first American community founded solely to care for the elderly.  Now, eighty five years later, our leadership has courageously stepped forward to accept the challenge of a reality show- something never before attempted by a religious community. 

The hope that our Sisters could demonstrate the joy, peace, love and support to be found in religious life is enhanced by the words of Pope Francis who encouraged us to evangelize at every opportunity, and by the courage of our Superior General, Mother Mark, who believes in moving beyond our personal “comfort zone.”

After discussion, reflection and prayer, the Carmelite Sisters for the Aged and Infirm committed to a TV production with unknown outcome.  Members of our religious community supported the decision to proceed with the courage that has carried us since our foundation, knowing that the benefit of sharing our daily life with all its ups and downs, may be the needed resource during this Year of Consecrated Life that might awaken in the heart of a young woman the urge to ask “What does God want me to do with my life?”

Pumpkins and Glad Tidings!

Sr. Pia Ignatius and Sr. Julie Michael spent some time carving out pumpkins and getting into the spirit of the season! The Novitiate has been quieter with the departure of the four newly professed Sisters to their Missions- but with Advent and Christmas just around the corner- the spirit of good cheer became alive as the Formation team organized a food drive, collected food items and brought packages to those in need at the local parish!

Watch those knives, Sisters!

 

                                                               Baked pumpkin seeds!

                                   Sr. Lois, Sr. Julie Michael & Sr. Pia Ignatius at St. Christopher's Church

Vocation Weekend Discernment

The Carmelite Sisters hosted a Vocation Weekend Retreat on November 7-9, 2014 at St. Teresa's Motherhouse in Germantown, NY.  Monsignor Kieran Harrington gave  powerful homilies on the need for  radical conversion of heart leading us to a full encounter with the person of Jesus.  The Saints of Carmel talk about this same radical call to discipleship which purifies us from petty attachments and false understanding of our religious calling.  The participants spent their two days of discernment enjoying the silence offered by St. Teresa's Motherhouse, inspiring talks, liturgy, and encounter with the Sisters.  Please   pray for the young women who continue to seek God's Will in their lives. May they find Him whom their hearts seek! 

FOR MORE PHOTOS

Sr. Pia's Visiting Day

On October 15, 2014, Feast of Saint Teresa of Jesus, Sr. Pia Ignatius received a visit from her mom and Fr. Pat Kelly, SMA (shown in photo above).  Fr. Kelly is a close friend of the family and has known Sister prior to her entrance to Carmel. 

"Novi-Chess"

Sr. Pia Ignatius shares her chess genius with Sr. Hope Therese!

Surprise Dinner for Senior Novices!

A flurry of activities descended upon our main kitchen one afternoon when Sr. Pia Ignatius, Sr. Julie Michael, with the help of their Novice Director Sr. Cyril Methodius, and Vocation Director, Sr. Maria Therese- planned, executed and delivered- a surprise dinner for the Senior Novices who will be professing First Vows on October 4th and will henceforth be on their way to their respective Missions.  As the line goes, a photo is worth a thousand words!

                                                                Sr. Cyril surprised by the camera!

                                                              Sr. Maria Therese busy at the wheel.

                                                                          Sr. Julie Michael

                                                                           Sr. Pia Ignatius

                                               Sr. Ambrose making sure everything is just right!

                                                                           A job well done!
 

                                                          Our soon to be Newly Professed Sisters!

What's Hidden In An Empty Box?

by Sr. Hope Therese, O.Carm.

Shortly before I left for my last mission as a novice in Davenport, Iowa the sisters had a Chinese food night.  This of course involved fortune cookies.  I received the strangest fortune cookie I have ever received in my life.  It said “What’s hidden in an empty box?”  I have never had a fortune that was a question before.  My first thought was how stupid it was.  How can anything be hidden in a box, if the box is indeed empty?  Yet, the question continued to drive me crazy. 

I received many varied answers from Sisters when I asked them the question.  Some said rice, Schrodinger’s cat, secrets, dreams, peace, love, faith, and hope as in the story of Pandora’s Box. Perhaps the box only appeared to be empty because what was in it was hidden.  Perhaps the box was really being looked at by a pessimist and was not empty, but full of potential.  With all the answers I received I had to come up with my own after much frustration. 

The empty box is my future.  Part of my annoyance with the empty box comes from not being able to see what lies in my future.  I am the sort of person that sometimes, okay most of the time, reads the ends of books and watches the ends of movies first.  When it comes to finding out what will happen next I am not patient. 

I have heard it said that the past is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift.  That is why we call it the present.  We need to appreciate every moment.  Every moment of our lives is a precious gift from God that we need to experience as it comes.  Once it comes it is gone and we will never have it back again.  When we are present to the present we are really living.  It is so important to really live.  The future is what we make of it. 

However, God is in control and helping everything to work according to his plan and the greater good.  Have faith and trust that God’s grace will impel you to make the right decisions in and for your future.  The same God that helped you through any problem you had in the past is still beside you here and now in the present.  He will be there in the future.  In fact He has seen your future and He is already there.  Nothing will interfere with His plan for those who trust in Him. 

Today I can look back on my past and see how the Lord was there all along even when I couldn’t sense how he was working.  That reminds me that He is here with me today even though I can’t see now how He is working.  When the future of a situation is out of your control knowing what will happen in the end will change nothing.  Learning from the past is good, but dwelling on the changeless past is pointless and a waste of time.  All you can do is surrender the past or the future of the situation into God’s hands and pray that his will be done. If we waste time dwelling on the past or dreaming about the future, then we are forgetting to live. 

In the Bible Mathew 6:34 says “Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.  Sufficient for a day is its own evil.”  The children of an almighty and ever loving God were never meant to be anxious.  Anxiety was brought into the world with sin when man damaged his relationship with God.  Our best friend Jesus Christ repaired that relationship by giving up his life for us.  With a friend like that on our side is there any need to be anxious?  Patience is a virtue and a gift of the Holy Spirit.  If we pray to God for patience he will help us to live as life happens without focusing on the past or future.  That is the way life is meant to be lived. 

When we wait for something it feels like forever, but when it’s over it seems that time has flown so fast.  Life is a series of journeys and destinations.  It is in the journeying that life really happens.  Humans are naturally anxious and impatient and peace and patience usually do not come easy to us.  That is why peace and patience are such precious and powerful gifts of God’s grace.  Peace and patience help us to live.  I recently received the joyful news of my sister’s second pregnancy.  This was something I was waiting for not so patiently, but the waiting helped me to appreciate the moment more.  Waiting for the special moments in your life is what sometimes makes them more worthwhile.  I have been trying to resist looking into, and even trying to ignore the empty box of my future.  There is nothing to see and only God knows what is there.  At present I have been filling up empty suitcases in happy anticipation of my first mission as a professed sister.  I will not know where I am going until Profession day on October 4^th.  I am starting to learn to be okay with that and everything else out of my control. 

The last fortune cookie I opened said; “Make your life a mission, not an intermission.”  I think that advice speaks for itself.  I refuse to make my life an intermission by peering into an empty box.